We spent this past weekend in Toledo, Ohio at an O’Shea family reunion. I had never been to Toledo and wasn’t quite sure what to expect. It was both much nicer than I expected and much sadder. Nicer in that it’s a friendly place, much slower-paced than So Cal. Sadder in that much of it seems depressed and vacant – vacant buildings, a vacant riverfront. There seems to be no lively city center at all. We stayed in an area called Westgate, and the street where our hotel was located was particularly sorry-looking. About the only still open establishment was the hotel. Pretty much everything else was boarded up. A couple of blocks away there were some lovely residential areas (we went running through them so got a first-hand look). There were a lot of for sale signs up, and prices bore no resemblance to California – a nice-sized single family home runs about $100,000!

The adventure started last Thursday. We flew Southwest to Detroit (A groups on both legs! Yay us!). We met up with Chuck’s sister Dina and her husband Kenny there (coordinating our flights so they landed all of ten minutes apart!) and rented a gi-normous car (a Ford Expedition) that could hold eight people, and then drove down to Toledo to meet up with Chuck’s other sister, her daughter, and her daughter’s boyfriend. Once we all hooked up, we headed out to dinner with their Uncle Dan. He’s a big guy – over six feet even with the shrinkage of age, and bears a striking resemblance to his older brother, Chuck, Dina & Angie’s dad Jerry (he also bears a striking resemblance to Walter Matthau). Jerry died young at 48, so seeing Dan gave all of them a chance to ponder what he would have looked like if he had lived to grow old. Dan sounds like Jerry and has many of his mannerisms, which made it a little unsettling for everyone. They all kept saying, “Dad did that!” or “Dad pointed his finger just like that!” in constant surprise.

Our first full day in Ohio was spent at Cedar Point, a huge thrill-ride amusement park about an hour and a half outside Toledo. Now, you might remember that Chuck had MAJOR SPINAL SURGERY two years ago. And that the doctor told him to avoid activities likes bumper cars for – what was it? oh yes, THE REST OF HIS LIFE. But our boy is a fella who learns by experience, so on arrival at Cedar Point he and Dina and Kenny immediately headed over to the Magnum XL-200. After the ride I asked him how his neck felt. “Okay,” he replied evasively, not looking me in the eye. In other words, his neck was already stiff. Did he stop? Uh-uh, no way! He went on to ride the Gemini and the Power Tower, and then decided to take on the Mean Streak, a big-ass wooden roller coaster. After that ride, he got off and said to me, “I don’t think I should have gone on that one.” “Are you going to ride anymore?” I asked. “Nope, I’m done,” he said.
And with that remark, his roller coaster riding days came to an end. He had scared himself straight. Dina and Kenny, on the other hand, went on to ride the Top Thrill Dragster. Classed as a roller coaster, this “ride” lasts about 22 seconds from start to finish and its claim to fame is that you go from 0 to 120 miles per hour in 3.8 seconds, flying up a 90 degree vertical incline 420 feet high, cresting the top then dropping straight down to the finish. We watched from the grandstands as people streaked by us, the acceleration so intense that their faces were frozen into whatever position they were in the instant the ride started. Like a weird variation of Edward Munch’s Scream, you’d see faces with wide open mouths blur by, the screams stopped dead by the G-forces shoving them into their seats. Oh yeah, that looked like loads of fun.

Having survived Cedar Point, the next day was calmer. It was also raining for part of it, so we decided to do a bit of sightseeing. In the late afternoon, we met up with some of the O’Sheas at Tony Packo’s, a restaurant made famous by M*A*S*H*’s Klinger. They specialize in such cholesterol-inducing delights as the Chili Mac (chili over dumplings and topped with cheese and onions) or the Chili Cheese Fries (French fries topped with chili and shredded cheese). Hot dogs are Tony Packo’s claim to fame, so with these “sides” you’d have to also get at least one chili dog. The specialty of the house were the fried pickles – take a dill pickle, chop it into chunks, dip it in a batter then deep fry and serve with a side of ranch dressing. It didn’t taste that bad – mostly you tasted the batter and the ranch dressing. I don’ think I’d try it twice, though. I don’t do hot dogs or chili, so stuck with the lone veggie option on this carnivore’s delight of a menu: the vegetarian chili, which was surprisingly good and relatively harmless, health-wise.

After gorging at Tony Packo’s, we all headed over to Fifth Third Park to watch the Toledo Mud Hens take on the Columbus Clippers. The Mud Hens are a minor league farm team for the Detroit Tigers, and they are HUGE in Toledo. The ballpark is very nice and high tech and seats 10,000 – and it was sold out the night we went. The game was a rout – the Mud Hems scored 5 runs in the first inning, and that set the tone for the evening. The Clippers got a few hits but the Mud Hens hot home run after home run, and ended up whipping the Clippers 22 to 3. After the game there was a fireworks show, and then the most amazing part of the whole night – we left and it only took us five minutes to get out of the parking lot!!! Now if you’ve ever gone to a Dodgers game you’ll understand why that is so amazing. It can take a couple of hours to get home from a Dodgers game.

The actual family reunion was on Sunday, and it turned out to be a beautiful day, temps in the 80’s, low humidity, and no rain – nice! There were about 60 people all told in attendance and everyone brought family photos to share. John O’Shea, the self-assigned patriarch of the clan and the family genealogist had compiled a family tree that went back to the first O’Sheas who came to America from County Kerry in Ireland in 1849. From that couple (who actually met on the boat) came all of the people attending the reunion. Pretty amazing! Family traits were clearly visible – it was a blondish-haired, blue-eyed crowd, and Catholicism was the religion of choice. I was astounded at how many of them had stayed put their entire lives, never leaving the Toledo area. When you come from California, transience is taken for granted – everybody moves. But if you want to really get at what America is all about, you need to go to a place like Toledo. You go there and you understand how George W. Bush was elected to two terms, and you see why there will always be volunteers for the armed forces. There is great strength in that small town America way of life.

You couldn’t pay me enough money to move there.

Many more pics here of the goings on.